We have all been to a gathering, a ritual, or an adventure that felt unrewarding or downright upsetting to be a part of. Then there are those experiences that we are absolutely over the moon for, experiences that remind us of who we are and why we are. Those experiences feel like magic, but it doesn’t take a spell to make them happen.

Seasoned experience designers, self-identified or not, tend to employ similar strategies, especially when it comes to opening people up to risk in a caring way. They share no common language for what they do, but there are clear patterns to what makes an intimate social experience transformational.